Thursday, May 25, 2017

Oh, Where Have You Been Mary Girl, Mary Girl....

Wow! I just looked at my last post here! Yikes!!!
I am so was last November.
When I posted in August, I mentioned my MIL came to live with us. She was very ill.
I didn't explain the illness, but now I feel like I can finally talk about it a bit.
In April of 2016, she suddenly became very ill with sepsis. I mean seriously ill!!! I have never seen someone so sick, so fast. We had just seen her a few days before! She lived just 5 minutes husband took her to the grocery every week....I took her to all of her doctors appointments...she had just been with us to celebrate my daughter's birthday!
We were with her all the time!
I was not familiar with sepsis. But now I feel like I need to warn everyone. If you think you have an infection....GO TO THE DOCTOR!!!
Once the infection gets into your bloodstream, it takes over so quickly. You become ill soooo quickly!
She was never the same after the infection. Her baseline (dementia)changed, she could not walk on her own (she was a high fall risk),  other conditions changed (blood pressure, blood sugar control. Everything changed.

Because I was the one person home with her...the bulk of the care fell on my shoulders during the day. That was difficult...tiring. But the nights were horrific! She had sundowners. She never slept.

All night long we would hear her getting out of bed to get her walker....she paced the hall. Out of bed, down the hall, to the bathroom, turn around, back to her room, out of bed, down the hall, to the bathroom, turn went on and on all night long.

Sadly, at the end of September, she died. It was heartbreaking. We spent the bulk of 2016 caring for her and then cleaning her house to sell. That was a huge job as well! 

It is a struggle to carry on with life as usual when you are caring for someone so ill...your normal routine is completely disrupted. But I tried to keep sewing and I had the shop to run. Thank goodness for my sister, the other half of Sunny Day!!! 

To "pretty-up" this sad post...I would like to share one of my favorite finishes of 2016. It's the quilt made from the January Block which can be found on Lady Harvatine's site.

mary xx


  1. Hey, good to see you back. The warning about sepsis is so important. Everyone should know about it. My sister narrowly escaped it when she had a foot blister from running, and luckily our Dad (a family doctor) spotted it and she got antibiotics in time. So sorry to hear about your mother in law.

  2. Your love and care for your mother in law is so special. We too are having similar issues, not sepsis, but alzheimers. Bless you for all you did for her.

  3. Caring for a loved one is a special gift to them, but it is so draining for the caretakers. Bless you and your family as you cope with your loss. The quilt is so beautiful and I love the hand quilting.

  4. I am so sorry for your loss. I am sure your loving care made her last days more bearable. I hope that you are taking care of yourself.... The quilt is beautiful. (just last night I sewed the final binding stitches on my flowering snowball quilt that I finally was able to make, after pinning it way back when you did the sew along. Thank you!!)
    hugs ~ Tracy

  5. Be still by heart! That quilt is amazing.

  6. I'm so sorry for you loss. We are going through something similar with my husband's parents.

    I love your quilt. I went to the link for the pattern and didn't realize that was the same quilt you made. Your quilt is so beautiful. You have such a fantastic sense of color. Hugs

  7. sorry to read about your MIL sounds like her last few months were so sad not just for her but you all. She is at peace now.
    Your quilt looks lovely far too complicated fo me to make a block like that curves are a real struggle for me.

  8. Thank you Mary for your post. Life is a struggle at times. You and your family have certainly had yours. Bless your little cotton socks for the care that you managed for your husband's momma. You knew you were doing the right thing no matter how hard. Now is it time to take a little goodness for yourself and your family. Just be and enjoy life. Making your own daily routine simple and good for you all. Think positive and take good care my dear.

  9. I am so sorry, Mary. I remember 30 years ago, my grandmother having alzheimers, the sundowning, etc. It was so difficult. So sorry for your loss. And what a beautiful quilt!

  10. What a tough year for you! I am sorry for your family's loss. Bless you moving forward...

  11. What a very kind and heartfelt description of what you went through with your MIL. It seams everyone we know is going through something with aging parents, including us. I hope the next generation is as kind to us. Hugs.

  12. I'm so sorry Mary, what a year you've had. I can't imagine the struggle and then the loss. I'm glad for quilting to help us in the tough times to have something else to think about if even for just a few moments. Such a beautiful quilt, as all of yours are! xoxo

  13. Dear Mary. God Bless YOU. Last year was a very rough year for you and your family.
    Sadly, it sounds a lot like my year too. My mom died in October. It was a struggle, emotionally.
    The house selling, I know that too. We did that for mom and dad three years ago. That was also huge.
    I know the emotional and physical drain it is. Take good care of yourself. Also, do things for yourself, like time out, quiet time. Sewing, reading. Take a walk.

    I am taking care of my 93 year old dad now. He is doing okay. I also take care of him every day.
    We do this mostly because we love them. Yes, the burden fell on our shoulders, and we are living two lives, but you know you and your hubbs would not have it any other way. She was safe, and loved.
    I am sure your kids learned a lot.

    I want to make this January Block quilt. I started it a few months ago and then it just wasn't turning out right, I was so indecisive. Looking at yours, I should let go of so much control.
    Thank you for sharing your latest trials. You are not alone.
    Now, I have a hole in my heart, and I also lost my 9 year old kitty boy Pierro last November, so life is still a bit surreal at times.
    Take care and love♥️

  14. I hope that sharing with your quilting friends has been cathartic for you. So many of us are dealing with similar situations with parents or family members, we feel your pain, applaud your nurturing and support your grief.

  15. I had a neurologist explain the issues you discuss with the sudden and not reversing symptoms caused by many things. I hate that this happened but having had a run-in with sepsis, I know that from a scratch in my hairline until the hospital was 3 days and my husband insisted I go as soon as he noticed red swelling under my bangs. Your MIL probably never noticed the symptoms and the body tried and failed to fight the symptoms. So sorry that the last memories are so tough, but so happy you were able to take care of her. The quilt is beautiful and maybe there will be time to make and share the beautiful things in life.

  16. Oh Mary! I am so sorry! So sorry that your last days with her were so hard! Hugs to you!

  17. oh dear Mary, I'm sorry for your lost and what you had been through, your mom is in the better place now and no longer suffer, sending my pray and though for you, God bless you dear..

  18. I'm sorry for your loss. Thanks for posting all the beautiful things you make.

  19. Mary, you are a shining example of a loving caregiver. You have done this twice with such grace. You are a wonderful example to others. The journey is hard, but what a gift you gave your family. Time for your self care now. Mind, body, spirit. Miss you. Be well.

  20. I always enjoy your creations Mary. Your hand stitching is the perfect icing on the cake. Your quilt is a happy place in the cycle of life that includes sadness and struggles. Sometimes creating in the struggles is the only thing that keeps me going. Blessings to you as you find a new place to carry on. I'm sorry for your loss of your MIL. I'm sure you were a beautiful blessing to her. Janita